If you have been following along, you have seen me talk about “thoughts”…. A LOT! You might even think that I have an obsession with thoughts.  And you might be right. Today I want to give you my BEST coaching tool that I use with ALL my clients and myself. I will give you an overview today, then I will break down each part in the next several blogs, so STAY TUNED! “The Self-Coaching Model” was created by my mentor Brooke Castillo.  I will refer to this as “the model” throughout this post.   Here is what it looks like:

C: Circumstance

T: Thought

F: Feeling

A: Action (Action, In-action or Reaction)

R: Result

  This is how it works:                 By using this model you can see how your thoughts about any circumstance create your results.  Let me give you a couple examples.  Here is one of mine from last year –   Circumstance – My coaching business Thought – I am not a good enough Coach Feeling – Incompetent Actions – Half ass work or no work at all Results – No clients   You can see here, that my business is neutral.  My thoughts about myself within that business creates a feeling that produces little or no action.  Those actions/inactions create a result that allows me to “prove” that I am not a good enough coach.   Let’s do another with the same circumstance. This is how my model looks today.   Circumstance – My coaching business Thought – People want what I have to offer Feeling – Empowered Actions – Get to work, produce high quality content, stick to the schedule, and stay consistent Results – My clients find me, follow my blog, and consume my content. I help people and get paying clients.   Can you see how this new thought produces a feeling that drives actions that serve me and my followers/clients?   And now I get to decide which thought about my business I want to keep practicing.  Do I want to show up to work feeling incompetent or empowered?  I think you know which one I have chosen.   Let’s do another one Circumstance – She did not show up on time Thought – She does not respect me Feeling – Angry, sad, rejected Actions – Act passive aggressive. Make snide comments Results – Less respect from her (the result will always be evidence for the original thought)   An alternate thought concerning the same issue will cause different feelings and therefore different results.   Circumstance – She did not show up on time Thought – She must be busy, I won’t take it personally. Feeling – Appreciative she made it, relaxed Actions – Act kind and understanding Results – No effect personally. No negativity.     Once you have mastered this model, you will have the power to take responsibility for your feelings, actions and results. You can choose to think thoughts that serve you. You can create any result you want and/or any feeling you want.   To be clear – this is not just plugging in a “positive” thought.  It is exploring the thoughts you have now, then finding out if you like those thoughts and if they are serving you. All this happens before we even consider a “new” thought.  Don’t rush the process.   My coaching is not about teaching you to think positive no matter what happens.  It’s about teaching you to take emotional responsibility for yourself and to teach you how to experience negative emotions when they come up (and yes, they are going to come up!).  It is also about showing you how to change the thoughts that don’t serve you.   Follow along this year and learn how to coach yourself.  I’ll be sharing all my secrets.  I won’t be holding anything back.  You can learn all you need to know to feel better and to start getting the results you WANT. YOU get to create it, you don’t have to wait and see what life gives you.   In my next several blog posts, I will break down each part of the model.  I want you to become an expert! Try out the self-coaching model.  Pay attention to your thoughts this week.  You might be surprised at what thoughts you have running around in your head.  You might also gain some insight on how you have gotten where you are today.   Be an explorer, a researcher of your own mind.  Be curious, be fascinated.  But never, NEVER beat yourself up about what you find. Treat yourself with love and compassion.  

Want help practicing the Self-Coaching Model? In 20-30 minutes I will help you master the model so you can coach yourself whenever you want.  Click Here to schedule your FREE mini-session with me.  There is NO obligation.

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If you have been following along, you have seen me talk about “thoughts”…. A LOT! You might even think that I have an obsession with thoughts.  And you might be right.

Today I want to give you my BEST coaching tool that I use with ALL my clients and myself. I will give you an overview today, then I will break down each part in the next several blogs, so STAY TUNED!

“The Self-Coaching Model” was created by my mentor Brooke Castillo.  I will refer to this as “the model” throughout this post.   Here is what it looks like:

C: Circumstance

T: Thought

F: Feeling

A: Action (Action, In-action or Reaction)

R: Result

 

This is how it works:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By using this model you can see how your thoughts about any circumstance create your results.  Let me give you a couple examples.  Here is one of mine from last year –

 

Circumstance – My coaching business

Thought – I am not a good enough Coach

Feeling – Incompetent

Actions – Half ass work or no work at all

Results – No clients

 

You can see here, that my business is neutral.  My thoughts about myself within that business creates a feeling that produces little or no action.  Those actions/inactions create a result that allows me to “prove” that I am not a good enough coach.

 

Let’s do another with the same circumstance. This is how my model looks today.

 

Circumstance – My coaching business

Thought – People want what I have to offer

Feeling – Empowered

Actions – Get to work, produce high quality content, stick to the schedule, and stay consistent

Results – My clients find me, follow my blog, and consume my content. I help people and get paying clients.

 

Can you see how this new thought produces a feeling that drives actions that serve me and my followers/clients?

 

And now I get to decide which thought about my business I want to keep practicing.  Do I want to show up to work feeling incompetent or empowered?  I think you know which one I have chosen.

 

Let’s do another one
Circumstance – She did not show up on time

Thought – She does not respect me

Feeling – Angry, sad, rejected

Actions – Act passive aggressive. Make snide comments

Results – Less respect from her (the result will always be evidence for the original thought)

 

An alternate thought concerning the same issue will cause different feelings and therefore different results.

 

Circumstance – She did not show up on time

Thought – She must be busy, I won’t take it personally.

Feeling – Appreciative she made it, relaxed

Actions – Act kind and understanding

Results – No effect personally. No negativity.

 

 

Once you have mastered this model, you will have the power to take responsibility for your feelings, actions and results. You can choose to think thoughts that serve you. You can create any result you want and/or any feeling you want.

 

To be clear – this is not just plugging in a “positive” thought.  It is exploring the thoughts you have now, then finding out if you like those thoughts and if they are serving you. All this happens before we even consider a “new” thought.  Don’t rush the process.

 

My coaching is not about teaching you to think positive no matter what happens.  It’s about teaching you to take emotional responsibility for yourself and to teach you how to experience negative emotions when they come up (and yes, they are going to come up!).  It is also about showing you how to change the thoughts that don’t serve you.

 

Follow along this year and learn how to coach yourself.  I’ll be sharing all my secrets.  I won’t be holding anything back.  You can learn all you need to know to feel better and to start getting the results you WANT. YOU get to create it, you don’t have to wait and see what life gives you.

 

In my next several blog posts, I will break down each part of the model.  I want you to become an expert!

Try out the self-coaching model.  Pay attention to your thoughts this week.  You might be surprised at what thoughts you have running around in your head.  You might also gain some insight on how you have gotten where you are today.

 

Be an explorer, a researcher of your own mind.  Be curious, be fascinated.  But never, NEVER beat yourself up about what you find. Treat yourself with love and compassion.

 

Want help practicing the Self-Coaching Model? In 20-30 minutes I will help you master the model so you can coach yourself whenever you want.  Click Here to schedule your FREE mini-session with me.  There is NO obligation.

About the Author Rebecca

I am a life long student who loves to spend time with my family, play sports, act silly and have fun. My experiences have shaped me into a strong, focused and compassionate coach who desires to help others. I love hard, work hard, read too much, and have many exciting ideas. I truly believe I have no limits.